God's New Chapter

This week we began a new chapter in our lives. I have not always "liked" when new chapters have opened up for us. I don't do change well if its not "my" plan or how "I" thought things should go. This summer I was taught to let go of "me" and let "God" take care of what He wants for my life. Its not about me anyway RIGHT?? This is something I have always "known" but have had a hard time letting go and letting Him take complete charge, I have a bad habit of asking why, when, where and especially HOW and then asking WHY again. He has always proved faithful so I have never understood why I have had such a hard time stepping out of my comfort zone. I know deep down he won't let me fall. But still I think I have to question myself and what He has planned for my life. With all this being said I want to bring all of you up to date on how He worked in my life this summer and the changes He has given us during the new season of our lives serving Him.

While we were serving in Jamaica this summer, I was asked to start out one of our "weeks" by leading a team. I am typically an assistant trip leader and do alot of behind the scenes stuff, certainly never "wanting" to be up front and "lead." I was horrified at the thought of having to do this, good grief didn't God and these people know that I only signed up to be an "assistant trip leader?" I mean who said anything about "leading." It sure wasn't me!!!! With many tears and feeling like I was dying at the thought of being "up front" and I do mean being "up front" I don't do well with that, I would rather eat raisins out of a box (the most despised food ever for me) than standing up in front of people and "leading" them in anything!

I wasn't given a choice in the matter, all I kept hearing from Brent (who I didn't think was too wonderful through all this) was, "you can do it, I have faith in you." So off I went to lead this team with my amazing jamaican staff.....what did I have to fear? I knew our Jamaican staff would have my back and would be there to support me every step of the way. God was beginning to speak to me or was it that I had decided to listen??

As the team arrived I immediately felt God's hand upon me, letting me know everything was good, I was good and that it was all going to be ok. The trip leader and I hit it off right away, she was so much like me it was ridiculous. How in the world could this have happened??? I mean really God? How cool to place this team with "me, at this time and in His time not mine! Everything fell into place quickly, the Jamaican staff was fantastic and the team was beyond awesome. I didn't feel a bit scared, how could this be, it was so out of character for me. But it was not out of character for God who placed me in just the place He saw fit when He saw fit.

The week turned into one of the most amazing weeks of my life. As relationships were built and friendships were made God was ever present watching over and guiding us. I watched this team bloom! Many of them were so apprehensive and unsure of how to minister in the Infirmarie's, Children's Home's, to go prayer walking and at the thought of leading VBS. We began to encourage them and my goodness what a powerful week it was, we saw God move through each and every person on their team. My team, the team I was fearful of "leading." We all grew together during this week of ministry that God so skillfully orchestrated for all of us.

The week ended with many tears being shed as we parted ways, they had grown, I had grown and God truly showed up in all of our lives. Making what seemed impossible, possible. WOW He did all this for us!! He did all of that for me.

I have felt a huge sense of wanting to do more with my life, this life I have been given, for a very long time. I had not really began to pray wholeheartedly asking God to show me where He wanted me. So as I returned home after our summer trips, I did just that. I prayed and asked God to place me where He needed me, where He wanted me, no longer where "I" wanted to be. He answered in a way in which I wasn't expecting, I felt that I was being led to speak with Praying Pelican about becoming a full time employee as a Mission Coordinator, which means "LEADING" trips. Oh my, seriously God?????? So I followed His lead and began to pray about it even more and low and behold I started my new position Monday morning as a full time Missionary with Praying Pelican as a Missions Coordinator. Wow, I still can't believe where this journey has taken me. I can only anticipate what God has instore for our future.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't apprehensive or afraid because I am. Sometimes I become so overwhelmed with worry as to whether or not I can do this. I look at the mounds of notes I have taken since Monday and the pen that is almost out of ink and think oh my how will I ever be able to do this. I know how I will do it and that will be with God's help, He is the one who put me here at this time in my life and I know He will not let me fail.

We would appreciate any prayers that you would want to send up on our behalf, Brent and I have always ministered "together" so when we are seperated it will be very different. We will still lead many teams together just not all of them. We know God has it all under control as we move forward. What a mighty God we serve, we just need to remember to listen to that still small voice instead of trying to do things as we see fit. Its not about you or me its all about HIM!!

Blessings,

Cathy